What does next of kin mean?

Next of kin is an old phrase that just means a person’s closest living relatives. Usually that will be a spouse, a child, or a parent, though it could be a grandparent, aunt, uncle, sibling, or cousin.

In the US there is no single national definition. Each state sets its own, and sets a different one depending on what is being decided. Who inherits comes from your state’s intestacy law. Who makes medical decisions comes from a separate surrogate law. Who arranges the funeral is set by a third. The three lists look similar and are not the same.

The thing most people get wrong

Being somebody’s next of kin does not by itself give you authority over anything. It describes a relationship, not a legal appointment. It matters when there is no will and no paperwork, because that is when the state’s default order takes over.

If you have named people in advance, those choices come first. A will beats the intestacy order. A healthcare agent beats the surrogate list. A named beneficiary on an account beats both.

Who is my next of kin?

The order varies by state, and most states follow a similar pattern:

•  Spouse

•  Adult children

•  Parents

•  Adult siblings

•  More distant relatives, such as grandparents, aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews, and cousins

Three things about that list surprise people, and all three are worth knowing.

An unmarried partner is not on it. No state’s intestacy law gives a partner you never married any share of your estate, however long you were together. Some states recognise registered domestic partners or common law marriage. Outside those, you are not related in the eyes of the law.

A separated spouse usually still ranks first. Separation is not divorce, and until the divorce is final your spouse generally stays at the top of the list.

Stepchildren are usually not included unless they were legally adopted, no matter how long you raised them.

What responsibilities do my next of kin have?

If you die without a will, your next of kin may end up handling most of what follows. That can mean telling other family members, arranging the funeral, and sorting out your final tax return and any debts. The funeral home usually files the death certificate, and the timing is set by state law.

They may also be asked about organ donation and about an autopsy.

You can take almost all of that off their plate in advance, by writing a will, naming a healthcare agent, and signing a durable power of attorney.

What rights do my next of kin have?

If you die without a will, your next of kin are usually entitled to a share of what you owned, in the order your state sets.

While you are alive, if you have not named anybody, your state’s surrogate law may let your next of kin make medical decisions when you cannot. Money is different. Nobody manages your finances just because they are related to you. Without a power of attorney, somebody has to ask a court to appoint a guardian or conservator.

Can I change my next of kin?

No. Next of kin describes a type of relationship, so it isn’t something you can change. What you can do is name other people to make decisions, which leaves your next of kin without the same rights or obligations.

For medical and personal decisions, that means an advance directive and a healthcare power of attorney, sometimes called a healthcare proxy. Your doctor’s office or hospital can point you to your state’s forms.

For financial decisions while you are alive, that means a durable power of attorney. Durable means it keeps working if you lose capacity, which is the whole point.

For who inherits and who administers your estate, that means a will.

If your family is not the traditional shape the statutes assume, this matters more. An unmarried partner, a close friend, or a stepchild gets nothing and decides nothing unless you have named them.

What happens if I don’t have any next of kin?

If you die without a will and no relatives can be found, your estate eventually passes to the state, which is called escheat. Where nobody comes forward to claim a body, the county usually arranges a simple burial or cremation.

Writing a will avoids all of that. You choose where everything goes, and you can leave it to close friends, or to charities you care about.

FAQs

Who is my next of kin if I am…

• Married? Your spouse.

• In a relationship but we're not married? Nobody, as far as the law is concerned, unless you are registered domestic partners in a state that recognises that. This is the single strongest reason for an unmarried couple to write wills.

• Single with children? Your children, usually sharing equally rather than the eldest taking the role.

• Single without children? Your parents, if they are living. If not, your siblings.

• Single without any family? There may be nobody. Your will decides instead, and your executor handles your estate.

If I have a will and an executor, what can my next of kin do?

Your executor administers your estate in line with your will. Your next of kin may still have a say on organ donation and an autopsy, and depending on your state they may control the funeral, since being named executor does not automatically put you in charge of it. Most states let you name somebody for that in writing.

If I don’t have a will, what can my next of kin do?

They can ask the probate court to appoint them to manage your estate. The court issues a document called letters of administration, and the person appointed is called the administrator, or in some states the personal representative.

Taking the next step

You can write or update your will online with EveryWill, and it costs you nothing. Charities cover the cost, and you can choose to leave a gift to one if it feels right.

The information provided in this article is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. Laws vary by state. For advice specific to your situation, please consult a licensed attorney in your state.